Friday, June 19, 2015

Stuck in a Rut

Feelings and Free Writing

The past few days I've been stuck in a bit of a rut. Real life has left little time for gaming, so I've been logging into WildStar to sit and run around Thayd chatting in guild most of the night. I've run a few things--Wednesday I tanked a Bay of Betrayal and helped get a few more folks through it for the first time.

Last night I finished my World Bosses for attunement, and all I have left is to smash the extra boss in Vet KV.

But it's all felt very unexciting to write about. While it's been exciting to game, it just seems so bland on paper.

Which makes me feel like I'm stuck in a bit of a rut.

So, how does one get over this? I'm not entirely sure. I've been in an emotionally odd place the past few weeks. Some of it anxiety, some of it things going on in-games, some of it real-life issues that are scary and related to health...

But that's not stuff that I'd feel comfortable writing about ad nauseum and in detail for folks. While it's important to me, it's somewhat private, and not really the types of things that either should be said (for whatever reason), or that I want to say. Though, a part of me does want to say these things, I don't want to say them to the general populace who may stumble upon the blog. And then I feel like I'd be a terrible person for dumping it on the few people I'd like to tell about it.

So I guess I'm just letting myself free-write--trying out a new way to generate posts. Who knows, it may strike some ideas for future posts.

Gaming Plans

Tonight, we don't have anything scheduled in WildStar. So I'm a bit up in the air as to what to do. Emotionally, I don't particularly want to interact with people today, but I do want to be near them. Ah. The trials and tribulations of anxiety issues compounded by other factors, no?

Maybe I'll hop on WildStar for a bit and work on a few contracts. Finish up some dailies (I could use the rep to finish out some gaming goals), or do a few shiphands. Or maybe I'll log over to FFXIV and level over on Lamia. I haven't really played any of that in a while. I've been focusing mainly on Star Wars.

Or maybe I'll hit up Cactuar and work on my gathering professions, because they're a lot of fun and I can watch something on Netflix at the same time. Which might just be the ticket.

Hopefully, whatever I decide to do for gaming tonight ends up with some fun screenshots and adventures to tell tomorrow!


  1. It is sometimes hard to know whether to share personal information information about myself (ie you) or not. It took me many months of agony trying to decide, and i kept going back and forth lol. there is no right or wrong answer so share whatever you feel ok to share and dont worry about what the general populance might think about whatever you have to say. end of day, this blog is yours to use as you please :)

    in any case, I hope you are ok and whatever you end up doing gaming wise, have fun!

  2. Hope you feel better and the free writing works out. I enjoy reading when I can. You're a pretty cool person.

  3. Thank you. After a nice relaxing weekend I'm starting to feel better. I appreciate the kind words. ^_^ You're very cool yourself!

  4. Very wise words!

    Things are much better. In the process of trying to start a family, some scary things happened that medications were masking, but they're straightening themselves out, now.


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